Your wife would not have cheated if she was satisfied in the marriage. You need to be able to move on with your life so that you can find happiness again. Emotions are bound to be running high, but try to stay calm when you confront your wife about her affair. This will be a difficult conversation, but it's a vital first step if she has not admitted to cheating. If your wife is unable to promise that she will end the affair and commit to repairing your marriage and rebuilding the trust that has been lost, you need to accept that your marriage may be over. Do Do find support Seek support from friends, supportive family members, and a therapist to deal with your hurt and anger.
Embrace Change Your wife was wrong to cheat, and you shouldn't blame yourself for that, but infidelity is almost always an indication that there were problems within the relationship. Ask yourself whether you can genuinely trust your wife again. Find support, talk to a therapist, and work your way to finding happiness again. However, making threats will only make everything worse because it could get you in legal trouble. She is the guilty party and should be the one to move out -- at least until you know whether the marriage can be saved. Keep a journal of all of the things you did well. She will not find happiness with you or any man if she is not happy with herself. Do stand your ground It is possible to save your marriage. Your wife would not have cheated if she was satisfied in the marriage. If you do decide to reconcile, accept the fact that it may take you a long time to trust her again. If she was satisfied in the marriage she would not have cheated, but it also may be her own personal issue. Hopefully this article has shown you what to do and what not to do to handle the stress and feelings that comes with it. On the other hand, if you only have suspicions but no irrefutable proof, prepare yourself for defensiveness and denial. If you don't have children, or simply cannot cope with being in the same house, politely ask her to go. Doing things you enjoy will allow you to relieve stress as well. Do recall all of the things you did well in the marriage If you worked hard, treated her well, were a good father, and did your best to satisfy her sexually and emotionally, then you need to recall those times. Consider Your Options How you handle the situation depends on whether your wife plans to end the affair. You do have choices. It may take between six months and a year for you to come to a decision about the future of your marriage, says Maples. Do not think you are inadequate If you do learn why she cheated on you, realize that anything you did wrong can be rectified. She also needs to accept that it will take you time to trust again. This is the most important time to take care of yourself and let yourself enjoy life. You will be feeling alone anyway, like as if your wife has died, so seek all of the emotional support you can get. Do remember that it takes two to tango If your wife has been unfaithful, you need to realize that it is never more than partially your fault. This will help you justify to yourself that you are a good person and not point the blame all on yourself. You need to keep going out with friends, going fishing or any of the activities you enjoy doing.
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